by Sasami

Into the darkness,
I call your name, but
Do you want to hear
It or do you want
Me to quiet my
Pleas and vanish from
Your sight and your life?

Without you, I don't
Know if I can be
Happy. Yet even
Now, I find myself
Wondering if I
Am staring into
Oblivion.

There is blood on my
Hands, blood that my tears
Can never cleanse if
I lose you. I claimed
To bring you joy and
Happiness, and I meant
All the words I said.

Yet I brought more pain
With me, not the vast
Happiness promised,
Or so you now tell
Me, when you even
Speak to me any
More. I am sorry.

But no apology
Of mine can erase
What I have done, can
It? I don't believe
So. I find it so
Hard to believe in
Anything right now.

You are the one who
Holds the key to my
Happiness, but I
Have scared you away.
And now I find that
I might as well be
Calling into void.

--Chris Ess / Sasami
written 07 June 1999

Added 22 June 1999

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